


I Think I'm Finally Scared Now

by mcgarrygirl78



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Drama, Episode: s17e22 Intersecting Lives, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-25
Updated: 2016-05-25
Packaged: 2018-06-10 14:47:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6961270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He might have been terrified at the idea that someone could harm him, wanted to harm him, and potentially get away with it.  But he was never going to let anyone get the jump on him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Think I'm Finally Scared Now

Rafael walked into the bedroom and sighed. This was happening; he couldn’t believe this was really happening.

“Are you serious, Trevor?”

“Yes, I'm serious. I'm not going to risk my life because you can't control that South Bronx ego. One of these days it will get you killed.”

“This is ridiculous. I may have an ego yes, but this isn't something I do every Tuesday and you know it.”

Trevor passed Rafael by and went over to the dresser. He was pulling out underwear, socks, and pajamas. There was a duffle bag on the bed and he put the clothes in there. Rafael took hold of his wrist; Trevor snatched it away.

“Don’t touch me.”

“Don’t touch you?”

“Rafael, I am planning our wedding.” Trevor put his hand over his heart. “I'm taking steps for us to spend the rest of our lives together and you're giving potentially violent CO’s our address when they threaten your life. What the hell were you thinking?”

“It’s not as if I gave him our condo number.” Rafael smirked. “He has a lot of homes to choose from. Not to mention that he won't make it past the front desk anyway.”

“I'm glad you think that putting yourself, me, and probably everyone in this building in danger is worth a smirk.”

“He had already threatened me. I was already in danger.”

“So you thought it would be good times to put some other people in the crosshairs for shits and giggles? Bravo, Rafael.”

“I cannot believe you're doing this. You're safe here.”

“How do I know that? I don’t want to die on SVU’s hill.”

“And I do?”

Trevor walked over to the closet. His suit bag was on the shelf; he took it and put three suits in it. Four ties went in as well.

“You put this on yourself.”

“Don’t point at me, Trevor.” Rafael’s voice got darker. He hated being pointed at.

Trevor didn’t want to argue, he wanted to pack and get the hell out of there. As an attorney, both as a PD and in private practice, he had faced similar situations in his time. Threats went with the territory when dealing with criminals. In this case, a correctional officer was being accused of multiple rapes. His friends and his union were backing him 100%, as was usual in these types of situation. 

As the prosecutor, Rafael was subject to dirty looks and more. But the idea of someone threatening him with bodily harm and for Rafael to puff out his chest and let this maniac know where to find him…Trevor was beside himself. People always assumed Rafael was an easy win. The dandy suits and Harvard education was a mask. He was born and raised in the South Bronx, knew how to handle himself if the situation warranted. 

While he didn’t win every fight, Rafael had been in more than a few during his young life. Fear was not something you showed in his neighborhood. He may have felt it. He might have been terrified at the idea that someone could harm him, wanted to harm him, and potentially get away with it. But he was never going to let anyone get the jump on him. That mouth, the mouth that got him in trouble more times than anyone could count…this time it might get him killed.

“No one is going to die, Trevor. Please don’t go.”

“I don’t want to sleep with one eye open for I don’t even know how long. I don’t want to worry that I'm going to be brutally murdered and you are too. I can't do this.”

“So you walk out on me?”

“Don’t. Don’t you dare come at me with the big green eyes and the pouty lip. Don’t you make me out to be the bad guy on this. If you were being threatened you should have reported it. Did the guy you want to refer to as some face in the crowd do this, yeah, he had some part in it. But you stuck the nail in the coffin, Rafael. You let him get into your head and for dessert you gave him our address.”

“Where are you even going?” Rafael asked. Try as he might, it didn’t look like he was going to be able to stop Trevor from leaving. It also looked like he was packing for more than a few days away.

“Nathan offered to let me stay with him for a couple of days.” Trevor replied.

“Nathan Campbell? You have got to be kidding me. No way in hell. There is no way in hell you are going to stay with an ex-boyfriend. No!”

“I'm an adult, you don’t get to tell me where to go.”

“I'm your fiancée, goddammit!”

“Were you thinking about that when you gave a dangerous person our address?” Trevor asked.

“So fucking your ex is payback?”

“I never said anything about fucking Nathan. He offered to let me stay with him. But thanks for letting me know what you think of me. I appreciate it.”

“I'm not apologizing.” Rafael shook his head.

“Of course you're not.” Trevor put two pairs of jeans in the duffle bag before going into the master bathroom. He came out with his travel shave kit, toothbrush, cologne, and deodorant. They went into the bag as well. Trevor was zipping it up and then went to the closet for one more suit. “You wouldn’t dream of it.”

“I'm not going to let you walk out on me to go shack up with some ex. If you do, don’t you ever come back.”

“Cut the theatrics, Rafael, I think we’ve had enough for today. I turned Nathan down. It was a kind offer but I need to have space to be alone and think.”

“I need to know where you’re going to be. You’re my next of kin so if anything happens…”

“Don’t.” Trevor held up his hand. He didn’t want to hear it. All he'd been able to think about since he found out about Rafael’s stunt was his bloody, broken body somewhere in that condo. Would they catch him in bed? Would there be a knock at the door and Rafael be unable to stop them from kicking it in? 

Would they drag him into the bathroom, where the mess would be easier to clean up? Even though Trevor was leaving, he was taking all of those horrible thoughts with him. “I will text you when I get there. You can text back to let me know you received the message.”

“We’re really going to do this?” Rafael asked. His stomach was dropping, it was dropping rapidly, just like when that man approached him on the courthouse steps. He planned to keep his head up and seem completely in control.

“I don’t feel safe here.” Trevor replied. “I don’t feel safe…with you.”

Putting the duffle bag on his shoulder and the suit bag over his arm, Trevor walked out of the bedroom. Rafael wasn’t far behind. He couldn’t stop this; he couldn’t think of a single way to stop this. If he threw himself on the floor and started to sob he was sure that Trevor would step over him. He never intended for it to go like this. 

What an idiot he’d been to tell Trevor about his threat against the threat in the first place. But he was again stroking his ego…thought Trevor would think he was a badass and could take care of himself. How idiotic, he'd known Trevor forever. That was never going to be what he thought upon hearing that someone threatened Rafael.

“Please don’t stay with Nathan Campbell.” As hard as Rafael tried he couldn’t get the pleading out of his voice.

“I'm not staying there; I'm well aware of his intent. And that doesn’t need to be your top priority right now. You should probably find someplace else to stay until the heat dies down from this.”

“I’ll be fine here with Blanche. I'm not going to let a bunch of goons run me out of my home. It won't be the first time I'm on some CO’s bad side. I have a job to do.”

Trevor nodded though he didn’t look back at his lover. He was tired and he wanted to get the hell out of there. He had a long week ahead of him, needed to be someplace he could rest and breathe. Not that spending the entire night, or many nights, worried that someone was going to kill the man he loved wasn’t enough to keep Trevor wide awake. He had ZZZQuil in his bag and hoped that would help. Somehow he doubted it, at least for the first couple of nights.

“Cuchura, I love you.”

“I love you too.” Trevor turned around for just a moment. “Please be safe. Goodnight.”

He didn’t want to say goodbye. That was too final and the truth was that no matter how angry at Rafael he was, and he was livid, someone had threatened his life. This someone now knew where he lived. And if he had nothing to lose then it was as simple as coming to get him. 

Trevor would never say goodbye. Even if leaving tonight was the right thing to do, they would get through this. Would Rafael come out on the other side remembering that every battle didn’t need to be fought on the schoolyard like an angry kid…maybe? Trevor planned to love the insufferable S.O.B. either way.

***


End file.
